(ian mclagan, ronnie lane)

My mum she likes you, she thinks your swell ,
Got the makin's of a dance hall girl.
Your low-cut frock and your bird's nest hair,
Stiletto heels and the way that you swear.
She says to take you back to see my folks again on sunday

Why, it looks as though theres nobody in,
They've all gone out to see my auntie renee.
Don't you worry, you just come right in,
I'm sure we'll pass the time til they come home.
Well, let me take your coat, kick off your shoes,
Warm your toes, try the sofa.

Its getting dark, we'll miss the late night bus
It's only eight?
Well, i'm not takin' any chances.
Whats that noise? why'd they come back so soon?
Straighten your dress you're really looking a mess.
I'll wet my socks, pretend we just got caught in the rain.
Oh, your so rude.