I woke up this morning
Then I went back to bed
Said I woke up this morning
Then I went right back to bed
Got a funny kind of feelin like I got broken glass in my underwear
And a herd of wild pigs is trying to chew off my head
You know what Im sayin

Well I aint got not money
Im just walkin down the road
Said I aint got no money, honey
So Im just walking down this lonely old road
Well, I wish I could get me some money
But I forgot my automated teller code

I was born in a paper sack in the bottom of a sewer
I had to eat dirt clods for breakfast, my family was so poor
My daddy was a waitress, my mama sold bathroom tiles
My brothers and sisters all hated me cause I was an only child

I got the blues so bad, woo
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe Ill blow my brains out mama
Or maybe ill, yeah maybe Ill just go bowlin instead

Im just a no good, scum sucking, nose picking, boot licking, sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime

Nothing but a low-down beer bellied, bone headed, pigeon toed, turkey necked, weasle faced, worthless hunk of slime

Guess I pretty low self image
Maybe its a chemical imbalance or something -- i
I should probably go and see a doctor about it when Ive got the time
Make it talk
Aw, make it talk, son, make it talk
Ok, now make it shut up

Plagues and famine and pestilence always seem to get me down
I always feel so miserable whenever Im around
I wish somebody would come along, stick a pitchfork through my brain
Id flush myself right down the toilet, but Id just clog up the drain

I got the blues so bad
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe Ill blow my brains out mama
Or maybe Ill go bowling
Or I just might go bowling
Maybe Ill just rent some shoes and go bowling
Maybe Ill join a league, enter a tournament, put on a stupid looking
Shirt and go bowling instead
Yeah